As parents, coaches, and leaders, it's our job to believe in our children more than they believe in themselves. Join us as we explore how this empowering principle can transform the lives of our kids. Through the power of belief, we can help them rise to the challenges they face and live up to the potential we see in them. Don't miss this insightful conversation on nurturing the future generation and unlocking their true capabilities.
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Hey podcast listeners, Stéph & Shay here, inviting you to join us for a transformative adventure like no other. Mark your calendars for June 27-29, 2024, and meet us at the beautiful Sawgrass Marriott Golf Resort & Spa in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida, for Mindpower Breakthrough Live.
This isn't just an event; it's a turning point in your life, a chance to break through the barriers holding you back and unlock your true potential.
Your future self will thank you for this! See you in Florida!
Speaker 1:
So kids are so impressionable, right, And, but especially between ages zero to seven, arborization is happening. This is the building of new neurological connections. Okay, so we're gonna go a little neuroscience here. About a million new neurological connections are happening every single hour, So they're very they're like sponges very impressionable, soaking everything up Downloading and absorbing everything in their environment. So if individuals are gonna say you have autism, he literally will start taking on the behaviors that are associated with autism.
Speaker 1:
Just by the power of suggestion. Okay, let me tell you about a book called Mega Brain. Okay, it was written by Michael Hutchison. Has anyone read that book? Fabulous book, by the way.
Speaker 1:
So it talks about a guy at the turn of the century by the way, the last century, coming into the 1900s who was literally born with quote unquote, no brain. No, no, no, follow me here. He had a thin neocortex and a brainstem, but the rest of his brain was water. It's called hydroencephalus or sometimes shortened up hydrocephalus. But he lived a normal life, long life, and when he passed away they did an autopsy and they found out he had water in his brain. He had hydroencephalus. No one told him he had no brain. I want you to pay attention to what we're saying right here. Nobody said you have no brain, and thank God for that, because then he probably would have started acting like he had no brain, right, he just he didn't know, he didn't know and nobody else knew He really had no brain. It was water, basically, with a thin neocortex and a brainstem. That's how he was able to function. But he lived a long life, had a dog, was healthy, right, until he passed away And at first they just thought it was old age, death, right, and so nobody told him he had no brain.
Speaker 1:
By the way, yeah, that's fiction and it's in the book. But we told this story we're talking about this book to a friend of ours who's a trauma room physician in Orange County. Okay, and he said no, true story. He said so. My father's friend was an engineer that lived to be close to 90 years old. He had in his last will and testament that said hey, i only want you to do my autopsy. This was our friend's father did. The autopsy guy had hydroencephalus, had no brain water in his brain. This is true story. Now Nobody ever told him he had no brain And he became an engineer with a family kids, by the way, was able to get others pregnant. Somebody tells somebody they have no brain. They're probably gonna start doing other problems too, other health problems. So the thing is, in these stories no one was ever labeled as having no brain. They didn't know.
Speaker 2:
So they didn't act like they had no brain.
Speaker 1:
So the best thing in the world is not to label it and literally treat him as being perfect, just an awesome human being, all hard and just particularly brilliant. By the way, seriously, it's a way in how you think about it. It's a way in how you feel about it. It's a way in how you communicate about it around family, and then you think about certain types of programs that are really good at helping them develop themselves kinesthetically. By the way, that's another problem too.
Speaker 1:
You have a lot of individuals that are high kinesthetic and they're in classrooms that are made mainly visual, auditory, auditory, digital and not much hands-on. By the way, a lot of the quote unquote arts got removed from schools a long time ago, especially public schools, and so hands-on activities are really good for kids that are highly kinesthetic, and so to be able to teach him how to use his skill set and turn it into a superpower, how to take a hardship to fuel his resilience and his success, is gonna be key for you as a parent. But it all starts with you and your husband's belief in him and how you view him and, without using any labels, and just helping him And rapport and understanding his model of his world and loving it and appreciating it right, super, super, super, super important. And I think there's three things that are really important in terms of any relationship with a kid, and I think that this doesn't matter what a doctor would say they think that they have or whatnot And those three things are your unconditional love.
Speaker 2:
Your positive example.
Speaker 1:
And you being vulnerable. Right, these are things that we've heard over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. We have a good friend of ours that said it recently and refired it in our brain and we're like we've heard this over and over and over and over again. We need to make this conscious for us as new parents, that we will do whatever we can to show our unconditional love with Sebastian. We're going to try to be a positive example. We're not going to sit on the couch and be duds because he's watching right Mirror neurons are taking everything in. But then number three being vulnerable. We're not going to try and be perfect. I can't wait till he understands language to tell him about my hardships and when I struggled and when I failed, so that he doesn't put me on a pedestal and saying dad's perfect.
Speaker 2:
And think that it's not okay to fail. I think it's not okay to fail.
Speaker 1:
I'm going to let him know as often as possible about all my failures, i'm going to be vulnerable. I can't wait to cry in front of him, give unconditional love, be a positive example and then, on top of it, be willing to be vulnerable And no labels View him as perfect. There's a great study called the Pygmalion effect, in the classroom specifically, and it's been done in corporate settings, business settings, et cetera, and literally where teachers were told that there's kids that are going to be coming into the classroom that are not that bright, not that bright, and so we don't have a special ed teacher forum. Do the best you can just to move them along. They're probably going to be particularly slow. And then those students got Cs and Ds on average Same students, different semester, different teacher And the administration told that teacher these kids are particularly bright. They're amazing. We don't have any CP or AP classes for them. No college prep.
Speaker 2:
We don't have any gifted and talented teachers, so just do the best you can to keep up with them.
Speaker 1:
They're going to be faster than you. Good luck. I don't know how you're going to keep up with them And those kids got A's and B's.
Speaker 1:
A's and B's Same kids. They're documented over and over and over and over and over again. So one more thing and then we'll move to the special announcement and wrap up. Famous hypnotherapist Andre Weitz and Hoffer said in 1957, he echoed the words of George Esther Brooks, another famous hypnotherapist, And 1943 he said that the client hypnosis will not actualize what the hypnotherapist does not believe to be true. What we know in coaching is that the client in coaching will not actualize what the mind power coach does not believe to be true.
Speaker 2:
And then translate that to a family And the kids will not actualize in parenting what the parent does not believe to be true.
Speaker 1:
In leadership, the person being led will not actualize what the leader does not believe to be true. So this is you guys. you guys know one of our famous quotes and that we say this to all of our private clients, we say this to our elites all the time and we're going to say it to you.
Speaker 2:
It's our job to believe in you more than you believe in yourself. It's your job to live up to our belief.
Speaker 1:
Well, guess what Same holds true in parenting. It's your job to believe in your kid more than they believe in themselves or anybody else believes in them, And then it's going to be their job to live up to that belief, your belief. But the best thing you can do in parenting is believe in them and believe in them as being as awesome as they are And make sure that the right education program that will help them tap into their superpowers and strengths, because people that are labeled dyslexic, ADD, ADHD, autistic, et cetera literally they have some superhuman like capabilities and they need to be harnessed and leveraged.